That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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