I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize