i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
another moral hangover. fuck.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
