I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
