So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I just had sex on a roof
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
