I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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