did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize