I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize