We're like a lot better than the average bears
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Randomize
