there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
