i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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