It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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