I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
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