i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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