Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
