I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
