Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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