normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Randomize
