Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
