two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
please come you make the beer taste better
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
