five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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