I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I don't deserve a penis
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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