is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize
