Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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