so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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