omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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