her vagine was all disorganized.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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