I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
This baby is an asshole
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
