Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
