He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
