is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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