Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
