with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
