And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
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