do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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