what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
