Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I want to have your abortion
so let's talk penis.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
