Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
false alarm. still invincible.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
