Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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