It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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