my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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