Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I had to cum in my sink.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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