Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
tonight lets celebrate not being married
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
