Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm bleeding and have questions
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
