she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
