You work out of a Hotel?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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