i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
