so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
