It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize
