Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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