some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
